Tuesday, January 30, 2007

The Pug Intelligence Agency (PIA) has come through once again. I remember what happened and why I have been sore for a while. Remember those smug posts where I mocked the thought of having my manhood taken away...it turns out I should not have been so confident. Daddy assured me that he would never allow that to happen but an operative (who was in the process of developing a method to remotely lauch treats from one location to another) saw it with his own bug-eyes. Daddy and Mommy left me with that evil testicle stealer they referred to as a vet. Daddy said "bye Winston, we're going to lunch at TGI Friday's" and Mommy said "say goodbye to your balls for us" and Daddy laughed!!! This jogged my memory and proved his complicity! How could you Daddy?

This picture shows exactly how I felt upon realizing that I had been bretrayed: sad.

This post is to remind Daddy that I thought he loved me more than Big Mean Mommy. This was our first kiss, before I even got to come home from the breeder (4 weeks).

This was us the very first time we met, I was too young to kiss then (2 weeks).

This is him holding me as he explained football to me. All this love was just an act on his part.

I used to love him, too. Sometimes I slept on his sandal just so I could smell him. I don't know why I did this, I can smell him pretty much everywhere in my apartment.

He even claimed me as a native born Texan since he is; and he's a real Texan, not a transplanted Connecticut Yankee diguising his mild form of mental retardation as a Texas accent. [Parents' note: we have no idea who he is referring to.]

Why must you break my heart Daddy?

Remember the good times (7 weeks old)? When I was small and you looked really fat? I can no longer rely on you, so I shall seek help elsewhere. Auntie Roni suggested I write my Congressman, and I believe I shall.
Snarf everyone later and sorry for the angry post,
/s/ Winston, Grand Duke of Pugsworth


Pug Mommy said...

Good grief Winston! What a guilt trip.

Suki said...

Winston, I am sorry for your loss. Sure sounds like your parents betrayed you! Gee, I wonder who you could have been referring to when you mentioned the Texas accent? Hahaha! That's why we're moving to Oregon soon...blue state! ;)

LMizzle said...

You could get "neuticles" to make you feel like a real man again!

PS-my vet told me that neuticles are actually made from ground down fake eyes...so crazy!

Lynn said...

Poor Winston,
Rollo here: Winston, want to get back at your parents for life???
Eat your own Poop. It taste SOOOO good and drives humans crazy.

Anonymous said...

I bet you wish you could have went out to lunch with your mom and daddy

Anonymous said...

He's definitely giving 'the evil eye' in the first one.
Poor Winston, you are such a brave little boy!

Panda's mom

Duke & Gidget said...

I'm with you Winston. The next time I see your Dad at a Pug meetup I will be sure to pee on his leg. Oh and Gidget says she will bite his ankles for you. Us Seattle Pugs gotta stick together you know!


Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about your loss. We can now call you the ball-less wonder. Just kidding your mom & dad should be ashame of themselves. Picking on a poor, helpless little baby. You should report them to the pug patrol or better still file a missing report with the police.

Ronin_The_Pug said...

Winston, how can you say that about your daddy?? I'm veeery sure that your Daddy and your Mommy really, really love you! We've searched the internet and we found that you could have real problems if you wouldn't have the surgery little guy (because one of your balls wasn't in it's place)... C'mon, Winstoooon! I'm with you in this, I understand your pain, but think... Oh poor pooch... Pug kisses and hugs!

Auntie Roni said...

Democracy is a beautiful thing, Winston...don't let the man bring you down...they should have at least let you sow your royal oats a little bit. Am I right?

Auntie Roni said...

Oh yeah...tell your backstabbing dad that V. Young is Rookie of the Year. You are the Rookie Pug of the Year, hands down!!!