Sunday, September 30, 2007

More PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ recruits


As the ranks begin to swell, a formidable force is emerging.

This is Giggs. He will be the head of the Demolition and Interrogation Department. He is excellent at destroying stuffed toys...also, he is fairly tough despite being named after a soccer star (the lesser football to those of us Americans).

Giggs' love of destruction is largely unlimited.

Here is one of Giggs' latest victims. Before his end he told all that he knew (none of which could be independently verified).

This is Clover. She is head of the Intelligence Division. She has tricked her humans into thinking she knows lots of commands, so she scams lots of treats from them. She also tricked the obedience class humans into letting her skip the puppy class and go straight to the intermediate class.

Clover is also kind of a big deal. Here Clover is illustrating an important point. One of the recent recruits voiced a concern about the amount of naps that are allowed in PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ. Naps every 10 minutes sounds about right to me, so to anypug out there worried about the amount of naps, that concern has been addressed (there is also a union to protect our naptime!).

This pug is Herbie. He is an expert at stalking suspicious non-dog characters, such as this bird Greysie, who has infiltrated Herbie's territory.

This is Sequoia. She heads the Border Police Division in Alaska, where she watches for any Communists or Jack Russell Terriers sneaking in over the Bering Strait.

This is Sequoia in her indoor garb.

Sequoia heads the PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ Navy, which consists of her dogpaddling in a kiddie pool.

These are Rollo and Parker. Rollo (pug, foreground) leads the cannon-fodder brigade, i.e. he is expendable. Parker (Boston Terrier/Pug, "Bug", background) is Rollo's loyal sister and superior. It is her job to insure he does not kill himself through his own stupidity before it is advantageous to PIA. He nearly drowned last week trying to eat a treat at the bottom of his water bowl.

Finally, I have decided to reveal our headquarters. The U.S. military has the Pentagon, the CIA has Langley, and the President has the White House...PIA has this, now known as Pugly. I realize it is not exactly inconspicuous, but I have heard there are advantages to hiding in plain sight.

This is me in all my one-eyed glory.

Here I am searching out food from my parents.

A better view of their selfish hoarding of what they refer to as "people food."

They are a bunch of big meanies.

My work organizing the PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ Secret Police, as well as trying to steal food has left me exhausted.
snarf everydog later,
/s/ Winston, Grand Duke of Pugsworth

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

The Torture Begins Again
When my parents first brought me home, I thought they were ok. They fed me, played with me, and let me sleep between them. The one thing that really annoyed me was when they dressed me in stoopid costumes. Luckily, about early November this annoying behavior stopped. Unfortunately, for some reason it has started again.

This is a bumblebee outfit that my Texas Grandparents sent me. My parents liked it. I hate it...and them.

This is me contemplating how I would not had been subjected to this had just one of my world domination plans succeeded.

Another view, for some reason I get really sad when the mean ones make me play dress up.

Oooooooooo!!!! I see a treat.

Now I don't. These damn antennas are too big.

C'mon. Give me the friggin' treat.

I get really bored playing my parents stoopid games, I am much more mature than them, despite being almost 200 years younger.

Well Daddy are you at least going to give me a treat??? Don't worry, he finally did. But I hardly think the single treat justified my substantial humiliation.
Snarf everdog later,
/s/ Winston, Grand Duke of Pugsworth

PS- my Parents say that I am "barking myself into a citronella collar." What does that mean?

Sunday, September 23, 2007

New Recruits
I am proud to announce that the first recruits to the PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ Secret Police have been accepted. Other Pugs may still apply by sending pictures of your bonafides to me at: winstonpugsworth@yahoo.com

This is Oscar, he will head the Uniform Division of the Secret Police. It will be his duty to warn lazy bloggers that they are in danger of being subjected to enforcement action by PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ.

This is Napoleon, code name: the Stay Puff Marshmallow Pug. He is an expert in reconnaissance and covert operations. He was previously a shake-down artist in South Philly, so he can get rough when necessary.

This is Maggie, code name: the Seductress. She gathers information by batting her eyes and curling her tail. I must confess that I had a thing with her some time ago, but her skills are beyond reproach.

Now, I couldn't have a post without some pictures of me, and I also was tagged a long time ago, so here is my tag about my middle name. My middle name, as far as I can tell, is No. My Parents are always calling me "Winston No!". This picture represents Not cute.


Nice. I am nice to my Mommy because I always help her do the dishes.

Noisy. Here is my pug roar.

Outgoing. This is me (on the right) making friends at a pug meetup.

Obnoxious (Daddy suggested this one).

Only One good eye. This is a good picture of my good eye, on the right (my left eye), which still reflects light, and my bad eye, which does not reflect light because the retina is detached. You can actually see inside my bad eye, to the back of the eye, which is white, but there is also still some blood in there, so it looks like the top half is white and the bottom half is red. Kinda creepy. But unique.


/s/ Winston No Pugsworth, Grand Duke of Pugsworth, Director of PIA Recruiting, and Political Commissar to PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Really Confused
First of all, I wanted to thank everyone who said they were glad that I am feeling better. Honestly, I don't remember what it was like to have two eyes and can't imagine why anyone would need more than one. Now that I can play inside the house again I am really happy. Secondly, and most important, is anyone else confused about the television show "The Hills"? Is it real or not? To solve this mystery I am employing the same tool that helped expose a nefarious Jack Russell Terrier plot to decrease the number of comments on my blog--that's right, vote in my new poll.






This is me being confused as Mommy tries to explain to me and Daddy how "The Hills" is real, yet none of the people on it seem smart enough to watch the show to see all the conniving activities occurring.








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This is just a picture of me trying to impress upon my parents how hungry I am.

Snarf everydog later,

/s/ Winston, El Duque

Sunday, September 16, 2007

ATTACK OF THE KILLER PUG!
My Parents say that I am a snuggle bunny, but every once in a while I need to remind them that they are at my beckon call for a reason...they fear me! The following videos should make clear that I am not one to be trifled with, which is why I am qualified to organize a Secret Police force.


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I can also be pretty calm since it is my goal is to rule firmly, but benevolently.

Snarf everydog later,

/s/ Winston, Grand Duke of Pugsworth

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

I Support Victims' Rights
Snarf Everydog Later,
/s/ Winston, Grand Duke of Pugsworth

Sunday, September 09, 2007

Our Fearless Leader Reveals Himself
By general acclimation, Goodboy Norman Featherstone has been appointed the Chairman of the Central Directorate of PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ. My Congratulations to him, I am sure that he will do PIA, PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ, and Pugs everywhere a great service through his tireless efforts to insure that there is always something for humans to look forward to, namely posts of cute pugs. I know..."cute pugs" is redundant.
I am still organizing the PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ Secret Police, but I do not know if it will really be necessary. The pure intimidation and ruthlessness personified by Goodboy Norman Featherstone (above) may be enough to bring all but the most dense canine bloggers into line. Now, on to even more important things - FOOD.

When my Mommy or Daddy is in the kitchen, I expect to get food. When a very long time goes by without me getting any food [parents' note: about 10 seconds], I sit down so that my Parents remember how good of a dog I am and how cute I am.

When that doesn't work, I go check my food bowl to see if any food is in there. I also flip the bowl over to see if any food is in the other side.

And I lick my food bowl and sniff all around my food bowl to find any crumbs that might be laying around. Following is a video in two parts that shows the more extreme of my food searching behaviors:

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This is me jostling the bowl for a last little bit of sustenance so that I may fight off starvation one more day, ala Stalingrad.

Well... it looks like there is no food in my bowl. Soooooooo sad :(
Snarf everydog later,
/s/ Winston, Grand Duke of Pugsworth
PS- If you would like to join the PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ Secret Police and have a picture of you in appropriate Secret Police attire, please email me your pictures at: winstonpugsworth@yahoo.com

Thursday, September 06, 2007

Pugs Of The World Unite!!!!
My dear friend Goodboy Norman Featherstone has finally had the courage to address the elephant in the room. We pug bloggers are being sabotaged by other bloggers who fail to update their blogs regularly. The end result is that humans looking for distraction quickly run out of ways to waste time and must actually do work, which is quite unpleasant during working hours. A motion has been approved to found Pugs Against Lazy Bloggers Who Adversely Affect The Honorable Reputation Of Dedicated Canine Bloggers Who Do Their Part To Help Humans' Workdays Pass Quickly (PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ), A Division of PIA. I nominate Goodboy Norman Featherstone to chair the Central Directorate of PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ. Does anyone second the motion?

I think that only intimidation may be sufficient to insure compliance with a once a month posting minimum. Above is the suggested uniform of the PALBWAATHRODCBWDTPTHHWPQ Secret Police. I believe that all shall be compelled to RESPECT MY AUTHORITAAAA! Do the masses approve?

Snarf Everydog Later,
/s/ Winston, Grand Duke of Pugsworth

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Take My Survey!!
Your opinion counts!!! Please take my survey to the right.

Here is an old picture of me and Alpha relaxing. That is me on the right in the grumpy bear outfit.

Snarf Everydog Later,
/s/ Winston, Grand Duke of Pugsworth

Monday, September 03, 2007

Just Chillin'
My Doctor imposed moratorium on play has made me realize something...it is really easy and relaxing to be lazy. I used to always play and have fun (while driving my parents nuts) and people would comment on how I was the only thin pug they had ever seen. I did not understand why all other pugs were supposed to be fat, but I do now. Laying around and sleeping all day ROCKS!!! My waistline is gone, but my spirits are high!

I have recently discovered that it is really comfy to lie on the ground occasionally. This is me looking great!

This is me trying to avert my eyes from my Daddy's obnoxious behavior...if only he would occasionally let me sleep.

I feel like a wild animal getting its pictures taken by those hidden motion activated cameras. I think the surprise in my eyes speaks for itself here.

This is me exhausted and out of the energy necessary to run from the camera toting weirdo that is my Daddy.

Don't misunderstand, I still run the house and can sleep on the couch anytime I want, I am merely exploring my options.

Please let me sleep.

Finally, some peace and quiet.
Snarf everydog later,
/s/ Winston, the Grand Duke of Pugsworth